We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.
How? By your reaction. You cannot control a red light, but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react.
Let's use an example.
You are eating breakfast with your family. Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt. You have no control over what just happened. What happens when the next will be determined by how you react.
You curse. You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over.
She breaks down in tears. After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table. A short verbal battle follows. You storm upstairs and change your shirt. Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school. She misses the bus. Your spouse must leave immediately for work.
You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school. Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit. After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 traffic fine away, you arrive at school. Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye.
After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase. Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.
Why? Because of how you reacted in the morning. Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?
B) Did your daughter cause it?
C) Did the policeman cause it?
D) Did you cause it?
The answer is " D".
You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day. Here is what could have and should have happened. Coffee splashes over you. Your daughter is about to cry. You gently say, "It's ok honey, you just need, to be more careful next time." Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs. After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus. She turns and waves. You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff. Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.
Notice the difference?
Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different. Why? Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.
Here are some ways to apply the 90/10 Principle.
If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge. Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comment affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out, etc.
How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic?
Do you lose your temper? Pound on the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off.) Do you curse? Does your blood pressure skyrocket? Do you try and bump them? WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work? Why let the cars ruin your drive? Remember the 90/10 Principle, and do not worry about it.
You are told you lost your job. Why lose sleep and get irritated? It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger.
Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse. Now you know the 90-10 principle. Apply it and you will be amazed at the results. You will lose nothing if you try it.
So, let's all celebrate Diwali by understanding the true meaning of it.
Please unwrap the greetings by letting the card load and then playing it.
Once again I Wish you a very fulfilling and safe Diwali !!!
Terrorism, Media and If Gandhi would have been alive he would have been wearing "The Yellow T-Shirt"
Terrorism is a curse for any country. In this year of 2008 the entire
When bomb blasts hit
On the eve of Mehraully Bomb Blast, a radio channel was heard saying, people should not move out of homes and those who are not home please go home as soon as possible and at the end of the message the tune starts“ Sunte Rahiye....................... Radio Mir… - Radio Mir…, …Mir... Sun ne wale always Khush - always khush”. Can anyone ask them how long they can keep people happy with this attitude?
My brothers and sisters, please note the purpose of terrorists is not to kill the people, but to spread the terror. And the same thing is done by the electronic media but no one ever raised his/her voice against it. If media desires they can play the biggest role ever to encounter terrorists but they need to bring a lot of changes in their way of behaving at the crucial moments.
On one hand electronic media was advising people to stay at home, and on the other side their was a youth NGO, who didn’t care for their lives even and were helping people who were the victims of the bomb blasts. They are the volunteers of Yuva Pariwar Sewa Samiti(YPSS). YPSS has really shown the example of a true Indian.
They went to the sight of bomb blasts and picked people on stretchers to take them to the hospitals, which saved hundreds of lives. What if they would have been listening to the radio which urges people to go home for their safety? Many more would have died.
With not enough supporting staff in proportion to the wounded, the hospital authorities were relieved to have the Young, Enthusiastic and Active members of YPSS with them who handled the tragic situation in a Truly commendable manner.
YPSS proved its overwhelming participation by not only helping the injured to receive the medical aid but also soothing and comforting their wounded hearts with holy words of saints, telling them the real strength within and the vitality of realizing it, thus providing a powerful moral and spiritual boost up as well.
Undoubtedly it was a saga of a true, selfless and dedicated Humanitarian act.
I ask the person who was the radio jockey at that time, what if his family member would have been a victim of the bomb blast and everyone else would have been rushing to their homes and no one to take care of the wounded and victims.
Shame to those who are spreading terror for their selfish reasons!!!
We all know that time and health are two precious assets that we rarely recognize or appreciate until they have been depleted. As with health, time is the raw material of life. You can use it wisely, waste it, or even kill it.
To accomplish all we are capable of, we would need a hundred lifetimes. If we had forever in our mortal lives, there would be no need to set goals, plan effectively, or set priorities. We could squander our time and perhaps still manage to accomplish something, if only by chance. Yet in reality, we're given only this one life span on earth to do our best. We just live for once as we are now.
Each human being now living has exactly 168 hours per week. Scientists can't invent new minutes, and even the super rich can't buy more hours. Queen Elizabeth the First of
We worry about things we want to do - but can't - instead of doing the things we can do - but don't. How often have you said to yourself, "Where did the day go? I accomplished nothing," or "I can't even remember what I did yesterday"? That time is gone, and you never get it back.
Staring at the compelling distractions on a television screen is one of the major consumers of time. You can enjoy and benefit from the very best it has to offer in about seven total hours of viewing per week. But the average person spends more than thirty hours per week in a semi-stupor, escaping from the priorities and goals he or she never gets around to setting. The irony is that the people we are watching are having fun achieving their own goals, making money, having us look at them enjoying their careers.
Even so, time is amazingly fair and forgiving. No matter how much time you've wasted in the past, you still have an entire today. If you've just frittered away an hour procrastinating, you will still be given the next hour to start on priorities. Time management contains one great paradox: No one has enough time, and yet everyone has all there is. Time is not the problem; the problem is separating the urgent from the important.
Every decision we make has an "opportunity cost." Every decision forfeits all other opportunities we had before we made it. We can't be two places at the same time.
Even though we all are aware of the tradeoffs of "quality time vs. quantity time" in our relationships, we are not used to thinking specifically about how our decisions cost us other opportunities. Without this understanding, our decisions will often be unfocused and unrelated to helping us achieve our most important goals.
You may have heard the story about the analogy of the "circus juggler" to each of us as we try to balance our personal and professional priorities. I have heard the story repeated by many keynote speakers.
When the circus juggler drops a ball, he lets it bounce and picks it up on the next bounce without losing his rhythm or concentration. He keeps right on juggling. Many times we do the same thing. We lose our jobs, but get another one on the first or second bounce. We may drop the ball on a sale, an opportunity to move ahead, or in a relationship, and we either pick it up on the rebound or get a new one thrown in to replace what we just dropped.
However, some of the balls or priorities we juggle don't bounce. The more urgent priorities associated with self-imposed deadlines and workloads have more elasticity than the precious, delicate relationships which are as fragile as fine crystal. Balance involves distinguishing between the priorities we juggle that bounce from the ones labeled "loved ones," "health," and "moral character" that may shatter if we drop them.
The reason to list the benefits of reaching the goals is so that you can arrange them in the true order of importance to them and give them a sufficient amount of attention as they juggle them within their time constraints. Handle your priorities with care. Some of them just don't bounce!
To live a rich, balanced life we need to be more in conscious control of our habits and lifestyles. Actualized individuals have a regular exercise routine. They pay attention to nutrition, with lean source protein and fiber-based carbohydrates as their basic food choices. They relax through musical, cultural, artistic, family and of course spiritual activities. They get sufficient sleep and rest to meet the next day renewed and invigorated.
In addition to blocking periods of time for recreation and vacations, they also schedule large, uninterrupted periods of work on their most important projects. Contrary to popular notions, most books, works of art, invention, and musical compositions are created during uninterrupted time frames, not by a few lines, strokes, or notes every so often.
With your material, time, and energy resources allocated well, you should be able to use your innovative powers to focus on goal achievement. Effective priority management creates freedom. Freedom provides opportunity to make decisions. We make our decisions and our decisions, over time, make us.
Knowing the difference between Urgent and Important... that's what will allow us to live a rich and rewarding life. You may have thought your problem was "time starvation," when in truth, it was in the way you assigned priorities in your decision-making process. Have you allowed the urgent to crowd out the important?
Each day we will continue to encounter deadlines we must meet and "fires," not necessarily of our own making, we must put out. Endless urgent details will always beg for attention, time, and energy. What we seldom realize is that the really important things in our life don't make such strict demands on us, and therefore we usually assign them a lower priority.
All the important arenas in our life are there awaiting our decisions. But they don't beg us to give them our time. The local university doesn't call us to advance our education and improve our life skills.
I have never received a call or e-mail from the health club. The grocery clerks have never made me put back on the shelves the junk food I put in the cart, nor has a fast-food restaurant ever refused me a double cheeseburger and large fries because of being high in calories. The most important and most urgent thing as per current worldview and yet most ignored and most misunderstood one is that we never thought of giving some time to ourselves....only ourselves, where we can relax and be in the state of bliss ( Through the "Dhyaan" therapy called Brahm-Gyan or Self-Knowledge, which can be taken even in this era without any cost involved however, your true willingness is needed, If you already have got it, congratulations but if not, let us know and we would like to lead you to the path of peace and bliss, the path of self-knowledge. )
We never attended a presentation for how our country is doing in terms of growth, we never paid any attention to where are we heading day by day, moment by moment and yet we know which dress our friends wore in the office or college party.
And yes, We do receive hundreds of urgent phone messages and e-mails each week from people with deadlines.
You see, it's the easiest thing in the world to neglect the important and give in to the urgent. One of the greatest skills you can ever develop in your life is not only to tell the two apart, but to be able to assign the correct amount of time to each.
Beginning tomorrow, throughout the day, and every day thereafter, stop and ask yourself this question: "Is what I'm doing right now important to my health, well-being, and the ultimate mission in life?" Your affirmative answer will free you forever from the tyranny of what to do once you will realize the difference between Urgent and Important.
And if still you are in doubt that what you are doing is important or urgent or what needs to be done first as per your schedule........ Ask us by leaving a comment or mail us. Your id will be kept secret. For sure !!!
Best of Luck!!!
Divya Jyoti Jagriti Sansthan again proved to be the leader in self-less service to the victims of any natural calamity
Twenty one days of natural fury, more than 6.5 lakh evacuations, hundreds of casualties and more than 2 million homeless in 16 districts of Bihar. Such a catastrophic juncture has reached due to breach in the 200 year old channel by the river Kosi. A look at affected areas tell the obvious tale of the submerged civilization. Every relief effort so far appears too small in the face of natural ferocity. Though millions have been evacuated, many await relief to knock at their doors.
Divya Jyoti Jagriti Sansthsan & its subsidiary Yuva Pariwar Sewa Samiti are running relief camps in the affected areas for the last 17 days. More than 100 volunteers are working day and night to ease rehabilitate those who are left with no other option than begging for mercy. Also, Bihar ashram of sansthan has arranged camps that are successful providing releif to more than 4 thousand sufferers.
In other gesture towards recuperation of humanity in the affected districts, the sansthan plans to send further relief to the victims in the form od food ( rice, pulses, milk, powder, rusks, biscuits etc. ), medical relief ( medicines worth Rs. 3 lakhs, 4 well qualified doctors and four paramedical staff), clothes and 50 more volunteers to facilitate to task. The contingent was flagged off today 6th September, 2008 at 9.30 a.m. by Mr. Surender Kumar, MLA and Jai Bhagwan Yadav, Councilor from Jatkhore Ashram of DJJS.
Where no solutions seems in sight, the Sansthan is striving hard to serve those orphaned in the entire episode of natural havoc in Bihar. With situation as horrible as food riots in the area, these little victims desperately need someone to take care of them. The Sansthan further plans to organize exclusive camps for those rendered without their parents.
Food and medicines are the primary needs of the whopping number of victims dying an unnatural death in the affected areas. Support- Either big or small, either cash or kind is more than required to carry on with the releif work uninterrupted. Those hearts cry for their fellowmen who are languishing in the submerged areas in Bihar can extend their support to in forms of Cheque & Demand Draft that can be drawn in favour of Divya Jyoti Jagriti Sansthan - Releif fund and can be posted at Divya Jyoti Jagriti Sansthan, Plot No. 3, Pocket OCF, Parwana Road, Pitampura Extn. Delhi-34. For any further information, kindly contact 9818283444, 9810454444 and 9910245463.
Senator Barack Obama, whose father left home in 1963, was only two years old. They were separated by continents. Obama was twenty-one years old when he was told in a telephone call that the father he never knew was killed in an automobile accident.
John McCain, son and grandson of navy officers, had a father who was a four star admiral. He was very loving but very busy and usually faraway.
Many fathers of the American presidents die young. And even the ones who live usually fall into the Obama-McCain category. “I was never there,” says George Herbert Walker Bush, “Barbara raised him.”
Three fathers of presidents died before their sons were even born.
Rutherford B. Hayes
And many others died at an early age. James Garfield was one year old when his father died. Andrew Johnson was three, Herbert Hoover six, George Washington eleven, and Thomas Jefferson fourteen. Fully nineteen presidents lost their fathers before they reached age thirty. And only two fathers actually attended their sons’ inaugurations.
There is a very predictable family formula for strong leaders, good and bad. They have an attachment to the mother and an absent father. Hitler, Stalin, Mao Zedung all fit the pattern as neatly as Washington and Jefferson.
This is why presidential historians always wax eloquent on Mother’s Day. Curiously, most presidents, including the current occupant at
But first, consider the overwhelming evidence that mothers play a key role. Many recent presidents were literally named after their mothers but none of their many siblings.
Ronald Wilson Reagan named after his mother Nelle Wilson.
Richard Milhous Nixon named after his mother Hannah Nixon.
Lyndon Baines Johnson named after his mother Rebecca Baines.
John Fitzgerald Kennedy named after his mother Rose Fitzgerald.
Franklin Delano Roosevelt named after his mother Sarah Delano.
Woodrow Wilson named after his mother Janet Woodrow.
And on and on it goes back into history. Rutherford Birchard Hayes named after his mother Sophia Birchard. Of course it is not a perfect formula or Marvin Pierce Bush would be the president, not his older brother, George W. Bush, but it is common enough to defy any odds. “You are a
“God bless my mother,” Abraham Lincoln supposedly said to his law partner William Herndon,” all I am or ever hope to be I owe to her.”
“I was a mama’s boy,” said Woodrow Wilson, “no question about it, but the best
of womanhood came to me through those apron strings.”
So what is going on here and what does it mean for Father’s Day? Not only are most presidents unabashed devotees to their mothers but, to add insult to injury, in most cases, the fathers were not even there.
For many years this dynamic nagged on me. Not only is it the template for leadership but it seemed to be the template for aggressive and criminal behavior.
And then the puzzle was solved. The real question behind the problem is “ Fathers are absent from their families but what do the fathers of presidents and the fathers of criminals do differently with their lives?”
A quick study showed that the fathers of criminals are just absent. The fathers of presidents are absent but high achievers or sometimes heroes who expressed their interest or love to their sons. Even the poorest presidential father, Jacob Johnson, father to our seventeenth president, was a veritable legend in his home town.
According to Barack Obama, his father was the first African admitted to the
John McCain’s father and grandfather were both four star admirals. It was a first in American military history. And both were legendary, even heroic. But often gone.
The fathers of presidents were governors, senators, multi millionaires, generals, ambassadors, preachers and in two cases presidents themselves. Franklin Roosevelt’s father was seeking to build the first canal to link the Atlantic and
There is a compelling moral to the story.
If a father only spends his life serving his sons, reducing himself to the role of a taxi driver, running them to little league and soccer practice and math camp, all to show that they are a loving father willing to sacrifice their own advancement to give their sons an opportunity they never had, don’t expect the sons to grow up to be major league ball players or brilliant engineers. They will likely grow up to be taxi drivers just like their fathers, driving their sons all over suburbia as well.
On the other hand, if a father does something great with his life, achieves something significant or heroic, then, even if he is absent, his son will likely follow and may even do better, just to rub it in.
There is now much evidence that the role of the father, even his absence, is just as important in shaping leaders and presidents as is the role of the mother. Affirmed and empowered by their mother’s love but also hurt and frustrated by their father’s absence, a leader, including most American presidents, will strive to prove their value and worth with their great achievements.
(Selected quotes taken from The Raising of President and All the Presidents’ Children by Doug Wead, Atria Books.)
Toll in Ahmedabad serial blasts rises to 46, Monetary compensation announced, People ask can money replace the lost lives ?
Responding to an appeal from the police, the people in Surat by and large stayed indoors despite it being a Sunday. This was to avoid large gatherings that could be easy targets for terrorists.
The State government has announced compensation of Rs.5 lakh each to the next of kin of those killed in the Ahmedabad blasts and Rs. 50,000 to each of those injured.The Chief Minister assured the injured that the best possible treatment would be given.He appealed to the people to keep peace and cooperate with the authorities to maintain law and order. Governor Nawal Kishore Sharma said some divisive forces were trying to disrupt peace and tranquillity.
People of the nation have raised this question to the leaders of the country that whether money can replace the lost lives. People are furious about the fact that the politicians can pay to show some sympathy but can't take any action too avoid these kind of circumstance. There are reports that center agencies intimitated the states about the possible incidence before that happened. So, the question is if crores and crores can be paid as compensation and treatment, can't there be any prevention of the events ?
NOW, THE PEOPLE OF THE NATION ARE ASKING FOR AN ANSWER TO THIS QUESTION FROM THE LEADERS OF THE NATION
" HOW LONG WILL IT KEEP HAPPENING ? "
In the poem, the poet talks about illusion. He says worldly affairs seem to be very attractive. Illusion is very attractive, it has a lot of depth means an unintelligent person can not understand it and third it leads to horrible darkness.
However in the second line it is clear that the human being has promised to GOD before he came on the planet earth. Though many people either do not remember or do not want to remember after being involved and attached in this illusive world.
In the third line the poet says that he has to go inside his own until a lot of distance till the time unstoppable Death comes.
And in the end at the fourth line, he reassures his commitment towards the promise, he made to GOD.
SUMMARY IN SHORT : EACH AND EVERY ONE SHOULD PROSPER FOR THE PATH OF TRUTH, BLISS OR THE PATH OF IMMENSE LIGHT. THERE MAY BE HURDLES IN BETWEEN, BUT BE FOCUSED AND CONTINUE MOVING FAST AND DO NOT STOP TILL THE TIME YOUR FINAL DESTINATION ARRIVES.
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